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If Toasters Were Operating Systems

by Jeremy L. Gaddis on March 27, 2008 · 0 comments

in Humor

Windows Toaster

The windows toaster looks great, but sometimes it just won’t make toast. It either comes out burnt or raw, and you have to unplug the toaster and plug it back in again each time you want to try and make some toast. For every loaf of bread you buy you are forced to buy a new toaster to go with it.

Linux Toaster

The Linux toaster looks absolutely awful: it has wires crimped together, things are just hanging out of it. The first time you make toast with it the toaster burns it; the next time it’s raw. You read the man pages and invoke the command line “toast -verbose -breadsize 50132 -eject -o z3321 > /dev/toast” and it makes perfect toast forever after.

Mac Toaster

The Mac toaster has no settings or controls. It looks very stylish, but will only accept proprietary-sized bread which can only be bought from Apple dealers at ten times the cost of regular bread. The toast is fine except that the size of the bread is so odd that you can’t actually eat the toast it produces, although it does look very good.

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