10 Things Your IT Guy Wants You to Know
Written by jlgaddis on May 31, 2009 – 12:48 pm -If you come to me to ask technical questions, please don’t argue when you don’t like my answer. If you think you know more about what you’re asking than I do, then why even ask? On that same note, if I am arguing with you, it’s because I’m certain that I am correct; otherwise I’d just tell you “I don’t know” or perhaps point you somewhere that you could look it up. We don’t argue just for the sake of arguing.
When you start a conversation by insulting yourself (e.g. “I’m such an idiot”), you will not make me laugh or feel sorry for you; all you will succeed in doing is reminding me that yes, you are, indeed, an idiot, and that I’m going to hate having to talk to you. Trust me, you don’t want to start out this way.
We’re okay with you making mistakes; fixing them is part of our job. We are NOT, however, okay with you lying to us about a mistake that you made. It just makes it that much harder to resolve and thus makes our job more difficult. Be honest and we’ll get the problem fixed and both of us can continue on with our business. Lying to us and, therefore, costing us twice as much of our time will not win you any brownie points with IT.
There is no magic “Fix it” button. Everything takes some amount of work to fix, and not everything is worth fixing or — gasp! — even possible to fix. If I tell you that you’re going to have to re-do a document that you accidentally deleted two months ago, please don’t get mad at ME. I’m not ignoring your problem and it’s not that I don’t like you, we just can’t always fix everything.
Not everything you ask us to do is “urgent”. In fact, by marking things as “urgent” every time, you’ll almost certainly ensure that we treat none of it as a priority.
You are not the only one who needs help, and you usually don’t have the most urgent issue. Give us some time to get to your problem; it will get fixed.
E-mailing us several times about the same issue is not only unnecessary, it’s highly annoying as well. We record issues in a database so that we don’t lose track of them (remember how we ask that you create a ticket? That’s why.) We will typically respond as soon as we have a useful update to make. If your problem is urgent, please do let us know (but see number five).
Yes, we prefer e-mail over phone calls. It has nothing to do with being friendly or anti-social, it’s about efficiency. It is much faster and easier for us to list out a set of questions that we need answers to than it is for us to call and ask you them one by one. You can find the answers at your leisure and, while we’re waiting, we can work on other problems.
We may, at times, seem blunt and rude. It’s not that we mean to, we just don’t have the time to sugar coat things for you. We assume that we are both adults and can handle the reality of a problem. If you did something wrong, don’t be surprised when we tell you. We don’t care that it was a mistake because, honestly, it makes no difference to us. Please don’t take it personal, we just don’t want it to happen again.
Finally, yes, I can read your e-mail, yes, I can see what web pages you look at while you’re at work, yes, I can access every file on your work computer, and yes, I can tell if you are chatting with people on instant messenger (and can read what you’re typing, as well). But no, we don’t do it. It’s highly unethical and, perhaps more importantly, in all reality you really aren’t that interesting. Unless I am instructed to specifically monitor or investigate your actions, I don’t do it. There really are much more interesting things on the Internet than you.
I hope this didn’t come off the wrong way because, even as much as us IT guys refer to “users” as “lusers”, we do like (most of) you. Just like you, we’re here to do a job and we try to do it the best that we can. It’s easiest to do that if we all work together, stop pointing fingers, and give other people the space that we would like to get as well. If we can do that more often than not, things will go well and work out for all of us.
P.S. IT guys are easily bribed with food and/or beer (personally, I prefer the latter). That’s a sure way to get your problems moved to the top of the list. *wink*
Tags: funny, work | 12 Comments »
June 1st, 2009 at 12:30 pm
Are you taking applications for number 11?
“No its not the network, just because your email suddenly gets a little slow doesnt mean the network has gone down in flames. In all liklihood its something you did or its the application.”
June 1st, 2009 at 12:51 pm
Nice one! And yes, feel free to add to the list!
June 4th, 2009 at 9:06 am
To #4 you could add that in order for your issue to be resolved, you might actually have to let us sit at your desk.
June 6th, 2009 at 9:35 pm
June 6th, 2009 at 9:46 pm
Your IT guy may not be a guy. If I call and ask you if this is a good time to come look at your problem, I’d appreciate if you didn’t say, “Sure, he can drop by any time.”
June 18th, 2009 at 4:11 pm
Sounds way too familiar
I’m working as a IT guy and I could wrote exactly same kind of list.
I guess that working as IT guy is same kind where every you live.
June 20th, 2009 at 5:00 pm
Numbers 5,8, and 9 are so very, very true. Also, if I say “Please email me back as to whether or not my suggestion worked,” please, please don’t call me. I probably won’t answer.
August 1st, 2009 at 4:51 pm
While I agree with many of your points I must tell you that I strongly disagree with quite a few of them. I have been working in Tech support for 6 years and done the usual freelance stuff, (some free for friends, some paid, the usual stuff) for at least 12 years. From what you write I assume you work in a small organization or a big organization that is managed like a small one (in that case I pity you). If you want to advance in support, either to get a better job or just to be more efficient so that it takes up less of your time. Let me give you a few friendly advices.
First, itisallaboutattitude Keep a positive attitude to the user no matter what. Some times when I see an incoming call and I recognize the department or number and I just know it is going to be horrible I still answer with a smile. First because me sounding grumpy is not going to help the users attitude. Second because if I am more open to actually listen to what the user says I will probably solve it faster and be off with it err I mean him.
Here I have a few remarks about your points: 2: Yet again, Listen. What the user rely says is “I am scared of this, hold my hand, show me that you are not” . If you just sound reassuring (“oh, you are not worse than most” or “Don’t worry, We will do our best to help you. What was your problem?”) the user usually calms down and you can have a normal conversation. This is also a user that usually does as you tell them and tell very few lies, if you just get them to trust you.
(4) Just a small advice, yet again attitude. If it is not your fault, don’t try to excuse your self, in any way, ever. Tell the user that you feel for them, or even feel sorry but DON’T EXCUSE. More than 99% of the users will accept “I am sorry, but that is impossible”. If you how ever put it like “I can not do that (Dave)” the user is more likely to assume you are incompetent, lazy or bound by weird rules (avoid it even if you are bound by weird rules).
5: Yeah, you got to hate them. And as much as I want to say “I realize that people might get pissed at you for not being able to play minesweeper and pestering your colleagues instead. But we have people of less statue, with less than half your salary, that still are more urgent”. How ever you have to let the user know that you realize it is urgent TO HIM. Yet again sound reassuring and half of them will calm down.
8: This I don’t understand, most emails are horribly written “I can access my ${data}. When I open ${software} I get an error message.”, if you talk to them over phone you can ask them right away and not having to bounce messages back and forth. Further more pretty much every one I know (my old, old, old teacher that did stenography excluded) types slower than they speak.
9: Yet again, attitude. Speaking slower and using more words quite often makes things go faster. Next time some one calls, try answering with just your name. Then try answering with “Welcome to ${departmentName:-$companyName+” IT”}, my name is ${yourName}.” Most users will get confused and sometimes annoyed if they don’t have time to get used to your voice before you say your name or try to get some kind of information to them.
“P.S.”: No we are not, no matter which threats or treats you offer me I will make sure your case is prioritized appropriate for the company/department/person/my own liking, in that order. Being rock solid on this creates trust in the department and make people stop trying to get you to reprioritize cases by pestering you. And it is unethical, both coaxing stuff from people dependant on your work and to the people that get shoved down your list.
These are just based on my own very personal opinions and experiences so don’t take it as gospel, or “the wrong way” for that matter. But it is what I have learnt through the years and my style seems to work.
October 29th, 2009 at 6:02 pm
I am pretty sure this was just supposed to be funny and cute, not so serious Zinob
I don’t think anyone really subscribes to everything above, but it is funny and sadistically realistic.
October 30th, 2009 at 12:23 pm
My personal favorite is coming to me with the solution, and not the problem. If you KNOW how to fix it than go ahead. But if you’ve gotten to the point of needing assistance, it probably ISN’T what you think. Just tell me the symptoms and what you’ve changed so I can fix it.
January 19th, 2010 at 1:15 pm
This happened to me a little while ago.
them “Hey are you The IT Guy?”
me “Yip, how can i help you”
Them “Do you know what you are doing”
Me “No, I was the only one left in the office so they sent me”
them – sense of humour failure of note.
February 19th, 2010 at 10:08 am
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